Don't Preach
by MRobitussin
Summary: Another sister fanfic, sorry if you hate them. Hero is a young greaser that fell in love and made a mistake. After her boyfriend leaves, she realizes she's pregnant! I would like to thank shizamm for the idea. Rewritten to work better with time period.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

Chapter 1:

I stepped out of the black thunderbird and straighten out my shirt, not sure if I looked good for the party. My dark brown hair had been set in curlers for hours to achieve the wave it had. I was wearing my blue jeans and red sweater, because if my brothers saw me walk out in anything else, they would kill me!

I was the baby of the family; my parent's last attempt for a little girl had been achieved. When my mom was pregnant with me, my dad became very obsessed with Shakespeare and named me after his favorite character, Hero from Much Ado About Nothing. My brothers have just as unique names as I do, Darry, Sodapop, and Ponyboy. My parents weren't ordinary people and I miss them every day, they died in a car accident years ago.

My brother Darry and Sodapop work full time to keep a roof under our head, Ponyboy and I are in school, and he's two years ahead of me because he skipped a grade. He's the smart one in the family, he's a senior and I'm a sophomore. Oh and I forgot, we're greasers…lower class; I'm popular in my group of friends and I can talk to middle class and some high class, socs, but for the most part they don't want anything to do with me. That's because my youngest brother Ponyboy and our friend Johnny got mixed up in a fight and accidentally killed one of them in self-defense. Sadly the whole incident went from bad to worst, with Johnny and our other friend Dally both dying. It had been a year since then and we were all managing, but things weren't the same without those two. At least we still have each other and our friends Two-bit and Steve.

"Hero!" My friend Susie said to me as she stepped out of the back seat. "Wake up!"

I shook my head, awaking from my daze and turned to her. "Do I look ok?"

She smiled, standing there in a mini skirt and tube top. "You look fine! Besides, what do you care…you have a boyfriend."

Susie hates that she's single and I'm not. I've been with my boyfriend Danny for three months now and things were going great! My brothers were not big fans of him, but I didn't care. I loved Danny, he was 18 and the sweetest guy, when he asked me out he brought me a single red stem rose and every month on our anniversary he buys me a rose for every month we've been together. He's sweet to me and I know he loves him, my brothers just don't understand.

I walked into the party, cool and calm and looking around. My friends that I had gotten a ride from made their way in, but I stayed put, looking for Danny. I found him in a corner, surrounded by people.

I walked up to him and smiled, "Hey cutie…"

He smiled back at me. "There's my baby." He patted his leg and I sat on his lap and he kissed me. "What took you so long?"

"I curled my hair, do you like it?"

"You're beautiful no matter what doll, want me to give you a ride home later?"

I shrugged. "I don't know if the warden (my brother Darry) would like that much."

He smiled at me with a cool and calming grace that was unmatchable. "He's going to get use to me sooner or later, might as well make it sooner."

The party was the same as every party is on a Friday night, drinks and loud music. I didn't drink because my brothers would kill me if I came home with liquor on my breath, but I danced and chatted with my friends. I loved going to parties, I could spend time with my friends before having some alone time with Danny. My brothers refused to leave us alone for a minute when we were over there. Halfway through the party, Danny and I went in search of a place to be alone. We headed upstairs and found a room with a big bed, no one in sight.

Danny smiled, walking in backwards and holding my hand. "I think this is perfect for that…talk we need to have…"

I smiled back at him, letting him lead me to the bed. He sat down and I stood between his legs. "What exactly is it we need to…talk about?"

He leaned in and kissed me and we fell back onto the bed. Some how in the process of making out, Danny ended up on top of me. He started rubbing my side, which he had done before so I didn't mind, but after only a few minutes, his hand started to wonder up my shirt.

"Hey…" I whispered, pushing him off of me a bit. "What are you doing?"

"Hero…you've been teasing me for months with these tight jeans and tops…"

"I'm not sure about this Danny…we've only been together three months."

"I knew the moment I met you that you were going to be my girl. Hero, I want you to be my first, my last, and my only…I know you're scared and so am I, but know this Hero…" He leaned in right to my ear and whispered. "I love you."

I melted! No guy had ever said those words to me and I felt the same way. Danny had confessed his undying love for me and that he wanted to be with me forever. I whispered I loved you too and things…just kind of went from there.

In the movies, they always make having sex seem to be something that took hours. Maybe it was because it was our first time, I'm not sure, but everything seemed to happen so quickly. It did hurt, but in that good way and we had to get dressed right afterwards because I was cutting it close to my curfew. That moment was so perfect, I wish I could of stayed in it forever.

Month Later

It was a beautiful April afternoon, I was sitting at a small diner, drinking a pop and waiting for Danny. It was our four-month anniversary and I couldn't wait to get my roses. But when Danny walked up, he had no roses, just a sad look on his face.

I sat up. "What's wrong?"

Danny sat down with a heavy sigh and ordered a coke before turning to me. "I've got some bad news kid." He paused a moment, taking a deep breath. "I've been drafted."

My heart sank. "What?" How could this have happened? Danny was only 18 he couldn't be a solider!

"I've already been checked, I ship out next week."

"Next week?" I was hysterical and everyone in the diner heard me. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I didn't want to get you worried over nothing. I tried to get out of it, but the only option I have is to go or run to Canada…which is what I'm going to do."

"Run to Canada?" I shook my head. "No, I won't ever see you, I don't know when I'll ever see you again!"

"That's why I want you to go with me, we'll run away and get married."

I shook my head faster this time. "No, Darry would kill me!"

"That's why we're running away, they won't know where to find us."

"I can't do that! They're my family and I love them!"

"Who do you love more? Me or them?"

"You can't make me choose!"

Danny sat their quiet for a moment, and then stood up. "I think you already have…" He turned and started to walk out.

"Danny!" I yelled at him, starting to cry, but he didn't stop. He got into his car and drove off, leaving me there alone.

Two Months Later

I've got to admit, being raised around three older brothers doesn't make you in touched with being a girl. I mean I did notice the little things; my breasts were tender and started to grow out a bit. Within a while after that, I started getting sick…they call it morning sickness, but trust me you get it ALL the time! I started going to the bathroom little more frequently, I mean, I'm a teenager…my body is always changing and doing weird things, I didn't really think anything of it. It wasn't until Sodapop pointed it out to me.

I was sitting at the kitchen table, playing with the piece of chocolate cake I had in front of me, still feeling depressed. Sodapop walked in and messed up my hair, his favorite thing to do.

"Hey half-pint!" He said as he got in the fridge and pulled out a bottle of pop.

I just sighed. "Lay off…"

Sodapop laughed. "I've enjoyed depressed Hero over crazy Hero. Can you make your time this easy from now on?"

I was confused…my time? I wasn't on that, why would he say that? That's when I actually thought about it; I couldn't remember the last time I even had one. I spotted a bit, but didn't actually had a full period…was that a bad thing? I grabbed the phone quick and dialed Susie's number.

"Hello?" Susie answered the phone.

"Meet me at the park." Was all I could manage to spit out.

"Why? Something wrong?"

"Just do it!"

Susie raced up to the drugstore just as I did; we stopped right in front of each other, both panting. "What's wrong?"

"I'm…I'm not sure if there is anything wrong, I can't remember."

Susie laughed. "Ok so you made me race down here for you to tell me the problem is you can't remember something? Super important emergency huh Hero?"

"Sus…I can't remember the last time I had a period."

She stared at me a minute. "Wait…" Susie shook her head. "Is that actually possible? I mean, Danny left like two months ago, you would of noticed before this…I mean you write it down and everything right?"

"No…by the time they talked about it in school and I had already had one and well, I live with three guys! They're not exactly the most helpful when it comes to that."

"You and Danny used protection, you're fine." Susie kept staring at me waiting for an answer, but all I could do was look at my feet. "You didn't use protection?!"

"It was the heat of the moment, a fling, I didn't plan on sleeping with him!"

"But the point is that you did and you didn't use anything? I thought you were smarter then that!"

"Okay! Enough of the Darry impersonation! I need help!"

Susie laughed. "You've got two options, waiting nine months and seeing if something pops out or going down to the clinic."

"You need a parent for the clinic."

"We'll pay someone or something! I don't know! But it's the only way you're going to find out. Unless you want to tell Darry and have him take you there?"

I felt my eyes widen. "No! I'll take my chances with a friend signing."

Susie and I talked her sister into signing as my mother. Thankfully she promised not to say anything! Sitting in the waiting room of the clinic was torture. The whole room was white, even the metal chairs were painted white! This had to be the cleanest room I'd ever been in. I was the youngest woman in that room and the two older women glared at me from across the room. I wish I had worn all white, maybe I could of blended into the chair then.

The doctor that gave me the exam was probably in her 40's, few standards of gray hair mixed in with light brown, green eyes, and a few random wrinkles on her pale face. When she asked me what I was coming for, I watched her soft green eyes turn to stone, but she was professional. She did the test, talk about birth control, and waiting till marriage…everything I expected her to say. She told me it would take a week to get the blood work back and made an appointment for me to come in to find out.

It was the worst week of my life! It was probably stressed induced, but I was sick to my stomach more. My brothers started to notice and I told them it was just a bug I had picked up at school. I got a lecture from Darry about how I couldn't be missing school because there were only two weeks left. I just rolled my eyes at him; he was always like that.

I know this was only me, but I swear to you everyone at school stared at me! They knew, I didn't know how, but they knew I was at the clinic and I could possibly be pregnant. They all glared at me like I was the worst person they had ever seen! Judgmental jerks! They were all doing the same thing at that party that I was…but their guys hadn't left them. Everyone knew that Danny had split. Maybe they stared at me because of that? I don't know, but I hated waking up every morning and going to this place.

When the day finally came, the only person with me was Susie. I told the doctors my mother was unable to make it and they let me in because they had her signature, idiots. Sitting on that table, waiting for the doctor to come in and tell me the results, I began to shake. My breathing quickens and I felt like I was going to pass out. What am I going to do if I am? How am I going to take care of this child? What are my brothers going to say?

Susie must of saw me freaking out, because she came over and sat next to me, putting her arm around me. "It's okay Hero…just calm down. We don't know anything yet."

I laid my head on her shoulder and closed my eyes as the doctor walked in. "Hello Hero."

I didn't open my eyes; I couldn't! I could tell by her voice she wasn't happy, no matter how much she tried to hide her distain for me, I could hear it. Why did she have to go ahead and say the words? Her voice gave it all away, couldn't she just leave me here to cry?

Ignoring the fact that I wouldn't look at her, the doctor cleared her throat and said those words, "You're pregnant."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

So there it was…I was pregnant. According to the doctor, by the time of the last period I could remember and around the time the "act" had occurred, I was about 12 weeks…almost through the first trimester. She told me information about being pregnant and set up another appointment for me. I told Susie I wanted to walk home alone and she respected it. I had to figure out what I was going to do and how I was going to tell my brothers. I did lie to her a bit, I needed to think about how to tell my brothers, but I also needed to tell two other people first.

I always visited my parents' tombstones. When they first died it was every day, now it was once a week. I kept the place cleaned up and planted flowers for them. I found it comforting to be close to them. If I had problems at school or with my brothers, I came here. They always listened and didn't lecture. I knew this time they would be screaming at me, I just wouldn't be able to hear it.

I had just planted a rose bush between their gravestones, my mom loved roses. There were a few strands of weeds decorating around it and I started picking at them. "Hey guys, how's heaven?"

I know it's crazy, but I always talked to them, I would sit there and wait for their reply and then continue. I know what my parents would say if I could actually hear them. If there ever were something important they needed me to know, they would send me a sign.

I smiled, as I looked up after finishing plucking the weeds. "Sounds like you're having a great time…" I paused for a moment looking away. "Umm…look there's something, kind of important I need to tell you guys. You got a minute?"

I waited a minute, debating about walking away. Why was this so hard?

"I umm…remember Danny? I brought him here to meet you guys." I paused and smiled at my dad's tombstone. "Yes Daddy, no dating." I remember my dad always joking about that. "I told you about him running to Canada to get away from the war right? "Well, before Danny left we were at this party and things got out of hand and well…"

I stood up. "No God! That sounds stupid! Things got out of hand? I wanted it! Besides, what does this have to do with Danny at all? He's not even here!"

I stomped around a minute, kicking up a bit of dirt, frustrated with myself. How do you word this?

I sighed and plopped down right in front of my dad's tombstone, he was always the more light-hearted of the two, she would listen and not yell.

"Ok Mom…I ummm…" I bit my lip. "I made a mistake."

Oh god now I'm calling an innocent baby that didn't even ask to be created a mistake! What is wrong with me? The baby wasn't a mistake, the act that created it was! But that doesn't mean the baby deserves to be called that! The baby didn't do anything wrong!

I put my face in my hands, feeling like a complete idiot. How do you tell someone you're 15 and pregnant?

"There was a party and Danny said he loved me…"

Why am I pushing this on Danny? I said yes, I could of said no!

"I did this to myself ok! I made the choice and now I have to live with it!" I looked at mom's tombstone and then at dad's. "Yeah I know I haven't said it yet…don't push me…I just don't know how to say it…"

"Why don't you just say it?" Someone said from behind me, I turned my head and there was Two-bit standing behind me.

"What you doing here?"

"I was visiting Johnny and Dally…" He smiled. "Dally's full of stories you know, took a few minutes before I could walk away and then I saw you here and thought you might like someone to walk home with."

I paused a moment. "How long have you been back there?"

"Long enough to know you made a mistake and it has something to do with Danny…should I sit down for this?"

I sighed and just stared at him. "Do I really have to say it?"

He walked over and sat next to Dad's tombstone. "Might make ya feeling better."

I took a deep breath. "I'm pregnant."

Two-bit pulled out a cigarette and handed one to me, I put it in my mouth and lit it with my lighter. We both took a long drag, and then he looked down at me. "You haven't told your brothers yet have you?"

"How mad do you think they'll be?"

"Your brothers love you like no other girl they've ever met. Sure, they're not going to be happy, but you're going to work through it."

I took a deep breath. "Yeah well then, you tell them and tell me how it goes."

We walked back to the house in complete silence. I couldn't blame Two-bit for being quite, he was trying to let this sink in. I've known him all my life; he was like another brother to me. Though I was sure of one thing, he was taking it better then my other brothers would.

Everyone was home when we got there. Steve was sitting on Darry's recliner, with Sodapop laying on the couch and Darry in the kitchen.

"Hey guys!" Two-bit said as he walked into the living room and made Sodapop move so he could sit down. "Where's Ponyboy?"

Steve laughed, "Studying…what else?"

Two-bit laughed with Steve, but as he laughed, he nodded at me. I knew it was a signal to get them together and tell them. God I didn't want to do this!

I walked into the kitchen, where Darry stood adding different seasonings to dinner. "Hey Darry…"

"Kind of busy Hero." I forgot to mention that while doing this, he was also looking over bills. Darry could never just do one thing; I swear he goes over bills in his sleep!

I turned my head to the living room. "Sodapop, can you come in here please?" Then walked to the other end of the kitchen and yelled, "Ponyboy! Get in here!"

Sodapop came walking in. "What?"

Soon followed Ponyboy, "I'm busy Hero, what do you want?"

"I've got to tell you guys something."

"Dinner looks good Darry…" Sodapop said, walking over to him and trying to take some.

"Knock it off! It's not done, you wanna end up in the hospital?"

I walked over to them. "Stop guys, I gotta talk to ya."

Darry picked up the baking dish and turned to me. "What is it?"

I automatically looked down at the white and pink uncooked chicken and my stomach began to turn into twist and knots. My hands went right to my stomach and all I could manage to say was, "I'm gonna be sick!" Then I race to the bathroom, pushing Ponyboy aside as I ran.

I sat in the bathroom after my "moment," leaning against the bathroom wall and holding myself. I closed my eyes as tears began to run down my face. Was this what my life was going to be like for the next nine months? More questions came to my mind, but were interrupted with a knock at the door.

"Hey Hero, you ok?" It was Sodapop.

"Yeah…" I yelled, trying to cover up my sobs. "I'm fine, I'll be out in a minute."

I got up and walked to the sink, looking at myself in the mirror. My eyes and face matched each other in a bright red, my hair was thrown about all over and frizzing up, and I looked back at myself with pleading, helpless eyes of worry and fear. I ran the cold water and splashed it on my face, praying the shock of it would wake me up and calm me down. I took a deep breath and walked out of the bathroom, greeted by Sodapop standing there waiting for me.

"You sure you're all right?"

I nodded. "Yeah…I'm fine…let's go eat…"

I'll never forget the way Sodapop looked at me at that moment. His face was solid, hiding all emotion; he knew I was lying. But his eyes still twinkled with concern and care; he could never change his eyes. Together we walked into the kitchen. Ponyboy was sitting at the table, Darry was going between the counter and table, putting food down, Steve was sitting on the counter picking at the food Darry had made, and Two-bit was leaning against the opposite door of the kitchen. Sodapop sat down next to Ponyboy and Two-bit nodded at me again.

I walked over to Darry. "Hey…sit down, I've got to tell you something."

Darry took a deep breath and walked over to the table, turning a chair around and straddling it. "What's up Hero?"

I stood there, angled so I could see everyone…well I could see them if I was looking up, I was content with looking down at my hands as I ran my fingers around each other.

"Come on Hero…out with it…" Darry said. "Were you suspended?"

I laughed. "No…"

"Fail a class?" Ponboy asked.

I shook my head no.

"Then what is it?"

I took a deep breath. "I…um…" I was searching for the right words. Hadn't I made them up in my head at the cemetery? If I did, I had forgotten them now! God damnit!

Steve laughed. "Just say it Hero, not like you got yourself pregnant…"

Everyone except Two-bit and I joined Steve in laughing. I froze completely, unable to speak at all. "Laugh!" My brain yelled at me, "They're going to figure it out if you don't start laughing!" But I couldn't get myself to, nothing would come out of my mouth and I couldn't change my facial expression. After only a minute, Darry looked at me and stopped laughing.

"Hero…"

Tears immediately ran down my cheeks. "I'm sorry Darry…I'm really sorry."

Darry hands became fist on the table and he pounded down on it. "How the hell could you do this to yourself?"

"I didn't mean for it, it just happened."

"Oh yeah, yeah, it just happens doesn't it? What the hell were you thinking? You have any idea what you've done to yourself?"

I started to struggle for breath and with every breath I managed, I yelped. I looked around at everyone. Steve was frozen like I had been; probably in shock that he had guessed it. Ponyboy stared at me as if he could find some kind of signed that would prove I wasn't pregnant and Sodapop sat there with his eyes closed and rubbing his forehead. I backed myself into the corner of the counter and then slide down, sitting on the floor with my knees to my chest. I wrapped my arms around myself and just began to cry.

"Where is he?" Darry demanded.

I looked up at him, barely able to get the word out. "Who?"

"Danny! I know he did this to you! I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind and my fist!"

I closed my eyes, taking deep breaths to calm myself down.

"Where the hell is he!" Darry screamed at me when I didn't answer.

"I don't know!" I yelled back and started to cry again. "I don't know!"

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"Darry, calm down." Sodapop said as he walked over to me.

Sodapop knelt down next to me and rubbed my arm. "It's ok Hero…it'll be okay…" I looked at him a moment then flung myself onto him, hugging and clinging to him. He put his arms around me and rubbed my back, continuing to whisper that it would be okay.

Darry walked to the other side of the kitchen and knocked over a stand we usually keep the coffee mugs on, thank god they were in the sink so nothing broke. He leaned against the counter not facing me for a moment, then turned back to face me, having collected himself and able to talk. "What do you mean you don't know where he is?"

I pulled back from Soda, rubbing my eyes. "He ran off to Canada…"

Fire rolled through Darry's eyes as I spoke, "He's running away from this?"

I shook my head, "No…he left two months ago…I just found out today…"

Darry sighed deeply, glancing away. "You really fucked up this time Hero…"

What do you say to that? I'm sorry? It's not just my fault? I know? None of them sounded like they fit. I knew I let him down, but why couldn't he understand that I was upset and scared too? He didn't really think I planned this did he?


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

Why do they call it morning sickness? Does anyone actually get morning sickness? Is it only me that pukes not only in the morning, but also in the middle of the afternoon? On Friday, in the middle of my seventh period Chemistry class, I spent the whole time in the bathroom, every bit of my lunch being thrown from my body. I was so weak from it, my teacher told me to go home and get over my "stomach flu." Since it was May and school would be over in a few weeks, I didn't feel the need to correct him, everyone would know when I came back after summer break.

Ponyboy avoided me in school, but I think that was because he was mad over the fact that I was suddenly get some more attention from the boys in school. I hadn't gained any weight yet, but my boobs had grown a bit, not a cup size bigger, but more filled out would be the best words. He actually accused me of "sticking them out" on purpose while I was talking to his friend Joseph. I swear I wasn't…I mean Joseph is cute, but my back was killing me and leaning back on a wall made it easier, I can't help if the monsters get perky when I do that.

I called Darry to tell him I was going home, but the moment he heard my voice, he just said fine and hung up on me. It was slightly my fault; I'd been avoiding him. I just couldn't face him. Every time I walked in a room, his eyes would automatically go to my stomach. I hadn't even gained any weight yet; why did he have to stare at it like it was a curse? He barely spoke when I was around and the one time Two-bit asked how I was feeling, Darry abruptly left the room; it was uncomfortable.

Sodapop wasn't home when I got there; thank god I could be alone. I set my book bag on the floor by the door and went to the living room, turning on the tv and laying back, figuring I could just fall asleep to the tv. Nope, my body made other plans and I was in the bathroom again before you could say "hi."

Afterwards, I flushed the toilet, threw some cold water from the sink on my face and sat on the toilet, bent over and holding my stomach, praying that it was over for the day. How do pregnant women gain weight if they spend all their time being sick?

"Hero? You here?" I heard my friend Susie call from somewhere in the house.

I sighed. "In here…"

Susie opened the door then half closed it. "Is it safe to come in?"

I took a deep breath. "Only if you've got a cigarette."

She opened the door. "You sure that won't make you sick again?"

I looked up at her, annoyed. "I didn't smoke before Chem and got sick, it seems like I get sick whenever my body feels like it, so give me the damn cig."

"Okay…" Susie sat down across from me and hand me a smoke as she light her own then handed me her matches.

I lit it and took a deep inhale, exhaling as slowly as possible, enjoying the sweet taste of it on my lips and the relaxing feeling that was coming over my body. I hadn't felt so good in weeks.

Susie sat there, focused on the cigarette she deliberately twirled around her fingertips. She glanced up at me, back at her cigarette and finally spoke. "So how ya feeling?"

I couldn't help, but laugh. "How do you think I'm feeling Sus?"

She was quiet a minute before smiling, "You've got to admit Ponyboy yelling at you earlier in the week was funny. Like you would get with Joseph, especially now."

I glanced into the shower, not wanting to look Susie in the eyes. "Yeah well, he's acting better then Darry."

"He's still not speaking to you?"

I shook my head as I took another drag from my cigarette.

"He's going to have to sooner or later."

"Tell him that not me." I flicked my ashes into the tub and bit my upper lip. "He acts like this is only happening to him. He always does that! When mom and dad died he just froze up and when Ponyboy was in the hospital, he wouldn't leave his bedside and criticized me because I didn't sit right beside him!"

"Calm down Hero, you don't want to get worked up again."

"I can't help it Susie! With Darry being a stubborn asshole and now Ponyboy suddenly turning on me, all I've got is Sodapop who's probably taking crap for not yelling at me with the other two. This isn't fair! I'm the one suffering, not them."

Susie laughed. "Suffering? Having a baby is suppose to be a beautiful thing, don't let our health teacher hear you talking like that."

I shook my head; Susie was clueless, "Fuck her right now! Fuck everyone! Susie, you're not hearing me, I'm going through this, and no one else is. Everyone wants to act like they're suffering, but how are they?"

She gave me a clueless look. "Um, they feel bad because you wasted your future?"

"Fine, feel bad, I don't care, but they've got to understand what I'm going through. Danny is gone; this child will have no father and I know my mom told me babies should have a mother and father. Oh god my mom…" I put my head into my right arm and started crying. "Her and dad combined would be worst then Darry. I can just imagine their faces looking down on me in complete shame."

Susie moved in closer to me as I threw my cigarette into the tub. "Hero, it's ok. They know you didn't mean to do this, it just happens. Look, you're pregnant and nothing is going to change that, you've got to be strong."

"Strong?" I looked up at Susie. "A girl has to be strong to go through this. I barely hold down any of my meals, I'm not sure if the baby is eating, let alone if I am. My breasts are swollen and will probably only get bigger. People at school are already starting to question me about my constant sickness."

Susie laughed, finishing her cigarette. "Let them say what they want, you never cared before."

I took a quivering breath, hoping to quiet my nerves but no such luck. "I went to the doctor yesterday and he told me about being pregnant. Not only am I going to gain weight, but also I'll have constant pains. I could bleed for no reason; my body could just randomly miscarry. I'll have craving and could get sick off just the cravings. I'm going to be moody and all this other stuff I can't even remember. And then there's the fact that after this, I'll have a baby! This young life that's completely dependent on me; I don't know how to take care of a baby, let alone pay for everything it needs. I'm just a kid, Sus, how can I be responsible for another kid?" I started to cry again and couldn't stop myself. My body racked with every sob and I couldn't stop shaking.

Susie just sat there, rubbing my knee and hushing me. "You're going to be a great mom. You know your brothers will come around. I'm here for you, any time you feel like yelling at someone, yell at me, I can take it."

"Then there's the fact, that I think all of this and then I feel horrible because I wish this hadn't happen. So I'm bringing a baby into a world that it's own mother feels it was a mistake. What the hell kind of mother is that? I love this baby…but I don't. I made a stupid decision and now this baby will have to pay for it!"

"Maybe Danny will come back and be excited and he'll help you take care of the baby. Think of the fun side of this Hero. You get to pick a name and pick clothes. You get to give baths and read bed times stories, check under the bed for monsters. A baby isn't all work, there's some fun in there too."

I sighed softly, Susie would never understand, nobody would. "Yeah…fun…you're right. I should look on the bright side of things."

Susie shrugged, turning away. "There are alternatives…"

"I'm not having an abortion. Did you not listen in health class? Those things can rip you up completely, I could die from it!"

"What about adoption? Having the baby and giving it to some family that will raise it."

I sighed softly, looking down. "I can't do that."

"Why?"

"Because I know what it's like not to have a mother or father." I looked up, looking Susie straight in the eye. "Yeah, there will always be someone else to a mother or father figure to you…but it's not the same as having your real parents. You have a connection with a parent that never fades away. That connection…I can't explain it. I've gone through years now of feeling lost without my mom or dad there for me…how can I make someone else feel that way? Sure, the baby may never know it's father, but it's better to have one then none."

Susie was quite for a minute. "I didn't realize how strongly you felt."

"Well I do." I half snapped. "I can't give up this baby…it's a part of me."

"I didn't say you had to, I was only giving you an option."

I looked away, contemplating if I wanted to reveal more. Susie was my best friend, but I was going through something she didn't understand. But I need someone to talk to. I closed my eyes as I spoke, "I have considered it though…"

"Why? You seem so passionate about not giving it up."

I couldn't face her; I kept my head turned, praying for another cigarette to appear in my hand. "What kind of mother am I going to be?" I sniffed softly, beginning to cry. "I'm just a kid myself. I have to be responsible for this other life, care for it, and watch out for it. That's so much and it's not fair to me." I tried to breathe out, but instead I yelped. "I'm a horrible person aren't I?"

"You're not horrible Hero, you're human. Every woman has to get scared when she finds out she's pregnant, it's a big thing."

"Yeah, but other women get married and have someone there to help. I don't have anyone. Sure, you're there and my brothers will be there…kind of; but for the most part it's just going to be this baby and me. I'm going to be studying for finals while trying to rock a baby to sleep. I'll have to work at night so if I have to have someone baby-sit hopefully the baby will just sleep through the night and I won't have to burden someone with that." I froze. "Oh god I just called the baby a burden!" I started to cry. "What kind of mother calls her child that?"

"A scared one" Susie said, getting up and hugging me to her. "Hero, you're allowed to be scared and you're allowed to have your doubts, every person has them at some point in their life."

I sniffed and wiped my eyes, pulling back. "Yeah, but I can't promise these doubts will ever stop. What if I grow to hate this child for ruining my life? It didn't ask to, I chose to do what I did and this is what happens." I was quiet a moment, thinking to myself before I spit it out. "Why did Danny have to leave me?"

"Because he's an idiot and that's not your fault." Susie looked at me a moment, then sighed in frustration. "I want to help you…I really do, but I honestly don't know how."

I shook my head. "I'm fine…I think I'll make dinner for the boys. It's the least I can do. Can you help me with that?"

No big thank you from my brothers for dinner; kind of figured that. They just ate and went about their way. Ponyboy went off to his room to do homework, glaring at me as he went. Darry started to do the dishes and Sodapop retreated to the living room to lie out in front of the tv. I decided to go out on the porch to smoke and think; it had always been my favorite place. I loved to sit there and look at the stars and how they gleamed.

I sat on the half wall of the porch, with my back against the cool stone column that held up the roof. It was sprinkling all around me, giving the air a cool and crisp feeling. I loved the rain it could wash away everything. I lit up a cigarette and I exhaled I gazed around at the sleepy little houses around me with the warm glow of lights flickering in the rain. There were families in there, happy families that didn't have to deal with the lost of loved ones or the mistakes of another loved one. Part of me wished, I were in one of those houses right now.

I had made a plan for what I was going to do about my pregnancy. I had decided it while cooking dinner with Susie. I wasn't sure how to tell my brothers and I figured sitting out here would give me a chance to think it over.

What if I waited till we were all talking again? No, that's wasn't going to happen any time soon and they needed to know now.

What if I just let them find out? Hell no, it would be even worst then!

What if I told one and made him tell the others? That's not fair to the one who has to tell, besides which would take it the best.

Sitting there I realized I'm going to be a mom. I need to make decisions that affect this child's life; no one, but me would truly be there for this child. What kind of mom was I being? Sure I was scared and upset, but I should still stand up for my child against people who want to hurt it. I loved the baby the moment I knew it was there; I wanted others to love it too.

I stood up and proudly marched into the house, determine to tell them the truth. The moment I got to the living room, I turned off the tv, making Sodapop jump up. "Hey! I was watching that!"

"Who cares?" I said rolling my eyes and turned towards the kitchen. "Ponyboy, Darry, get your butts in here."

Darry walked in, stiff and proud like always. His shirt was two sizes too tight for him, making his muscle pulse under it. He stood in the doorway, crossing his arms over his chest and gave me a look that meant he didn't want to be there.

Ponyboy lagged in, book in hand. "What?"

"Since none of you want to talk to me about this, I'm going to talk about it now and then as far as I'm concern, you'll never have to hear about it again. I've made a decision about the pregnancy."

All three of them shuddered at that word as if I had cuss each of them out individually. I hate it when they do that!

"A friend of mine's dad owns a corner store on the west side of town, it's not far. They said they could get me a job working the counter."

"Wow a job…" Ponyboy spat out. "That'll work great during the summer, but what about the school year. That'll buy you a diaper pin."

"Shut up Ponyboy!" I yelled at him with all the force I had in me. I couldn't take the hated he radiated anymore. "I'm dropping out and going to work full time! That way I can help out around here and if need be, I'll leave."

"Nobody's throwing you out, Hero" Sodapop said, glancing at Darry.

Darry returned the look, but with no character. "I didn't say you had to leave, Hero. But you're not dropping out, you're getting your education."

"No, I'm dropping out. I'll get it after the baby's born. I'm not going through school with a watermelon strapped to me. You can't change my mind, Darry. I already filled out the paper work. After this school year, I'll no longer be a student. I start my job in two weeks. Pay is decent and I can help out here and save up."

"You need a parents signature."

"I don't have parents to sign it now do I? You don't sign it then I'll sign it for you."

Darry just shook his head. "Why do girls throw their lives away?"

I paused a moment and took a deep breath to keep from crying. "Because guys like you lie and say that you love us."


	4. Chapter 4

(Sorry it took so long for the update guys, the computer I type my stories on had some connection problems and it's now FINALLY working!)

Chapter 4:

School ended, I turned in the papers to make me an official dropout and the next day, I started my job at the corner store. By this time I was about 18 weeks along and my stomach had started to form. I was given permission to wear sweatpants to work given my "condition," but they didn't help to hide it. I started to have constant aches and pains throughout my body, making me very uncomfortable. My stomach and other random parts of my body would itch and no matter how hard I scratched, nothing seems to sooth it. My boss let me have a chair because standing for too long would kill my feet. If I got up too quick from my chair, I would feel very light headed. The doctor said that it was normal and to just take it easy.

I was lying on the couch on my day off, Darry and Soda were still at work, and Pony was in the kitchen fixing dinner. I had just closed my eyes and began to drift to sleep when quick movements in my stomach made me sit up.

"Ouch!" I said, holding my stomach. I saw Pony glance at me from the kitchen. "Something's going on…"

He just shrugged. "Okay?"

I sighed, moving my hand around my stomach. "I think…the baby just might have moved." I smiled.

Ponyboy sighed and continued to work on dinner. "Who cares?"

"I do Pony and you should too! This is going to be your niece or nephew!" I felt the movement again, a bit quick. "It did it again! Ponyboy come feel this. It's amazing!"

"I don't care what _it's_ doing, Hero." He made the statement with such distain.

I was about to respond, when Darry and Soda walked in the door followed by Steve. I sat up, smiling. "Hey guys!"

Darry glanced at me before heading to the kitchen. "What's for dinner Pony?"

I looked at Soda. "Hey…the baby just moved! You want to feel it?"

He walked over to me. "You're far enough along for that?"

I took his hand and put it on the lower part of my stomach. "Just feel." It took barely a minute before my stomach jolted with movement again. I looked at Sodapop with a smile that he returned. "You feel that?"

He laughed. "Yeah…almost felt like the baby hiccupped or something."

Darry walked in and sat on his recliner. "Sodapop don't be grabbing your sister like that."

I sighed in frustration. "He's not grabbing me…the baby is moving, you want to feel?"

He gave me an evil glare. "I'm not going to grab my little sister."

"How is it grabbing? If I remember correctly, you said you helped changed my diapers when I was a baby."

"That's different…you were a baby."

"And I'm about to have a baby! Are you telling me you're not going to hold it?"

"I'm not discussing this with you, Hero."

I rolled my eyes. "Fine, whatever…ignore it, the baby will just disappear then right?"

He didn't answer me, just picked up the paper and started to flip through it. Soda and Steve turned their attention to the tv and with Pony in the kitchen, I was again left feeling completely alone in my family.

The next day I was standing outside of the store, taking a smoking break. I wasn't paying attention when Ponyboy's friend Joseph walked up behind me. "Hey Hero!"

I turned around and smile. "Hey Joseph!"

I watched his smile fade and his eyes widen. "Umm…how's your summer going?"

I nodded, knowing what he was staring at. "Working a lot, trying to save up money and help out my brothers."

"Yeah…um…well it was good seeing you." He faked a smile.

I half-heartedly smiled. "Yeah you too."

He turned and walked away, glancing back a few times as he went. I finished off the last drag of my cigarette and turned to walk back in, wondering how long it would take before this got all over town.

Just so you know, it didn't take long. When I got home from work that night, everyone was there, including Steve and Two-bit and Ponyboy came marching in from the kitchen. "What the hell are you thinking?"

I was rather surprised, Ponyboy rarely cussed. "Excuse me?"

"Parading around town showing off…that thing!"

I smiled coolly. "This thing as you so call it is your niece or nephew, show it some respect."

"Why don't you show our family some respect?"

I laughed. "If you don't mind Ponyboy, I have no idea what you're talking about and I'm rather hungry so if you could just…"

"Joseph said he saw you today, standing around smoking a cigarette and rubbing your belly like it was the greatest thing ever!"

"Did he mention I was at work on break?"

"Go smoke in the back or something! Hero, this is embarrassing, you know what people are going to be saying about you now?"

I sighed. "I really don't care what people are going to say. What happened is between me and Danny and well Danny's gone, so now it's just between me."

"Yeah and your stomach leads a lot to the imagination. Go ahead and flaunt yourself, but don't expect me to defend you!" Ponyboy marched off in a gallant fit.

I stood there dumbfounded. Smoking a cigarette was now a crime? Man, I need to be arrested then! There again, so did Ponyboy. What was wrong with him?

The baby's movements became more constant in the following weeks. If my brothers were around when the baby did something I would ask them to feel, but all of them refused to, even Sodapop. It hurt to feel so disconnected from my own flesh and blood. Sure, the last few years had us growing apart, but that's because they couldn't accept that I was a woman. Now they were force to, guess it's not very fair to them. But is it fair for this child to born into a family that doesn't love it?

At my next doctor's appointment, she listened to the baby's movements. "Sounds like the little one is really getting around."

I half smiled. "Yeah, they seem to like to move."

She looked at me and sat down next to me. "Hero, you feeling ok?"

I shook my head. "Other then what you said are normal pregnancy pains, I'm fine. My family is just being a bit hard on me."

"It's a lot to accept that your daughter is going to have a baby at such a young age. Have they felt the baby move?"

"No, they refuse to."

"Cheer up, once they see this little thing's smile they'll be smiling too." She gave me a halfhearted smile and all I could do was smile back. I knew that inside she thought that I was a slut and no good to anyone, but she at least tried to be supportive.

I had to go straight to work from my appointment. Susie came up to visit me and brought me some food. We were sitting behind the counter, talking and eating as Ponyboy and a few of his friends walked in.

He glared at me. "Hi Hero…" He said it with such a hate in his voice it gave me shivers.

"Hi Pony…" I looked at his friends. "Hey guys."

Ponyboy's friend Curly walked up and looked me up and down. I never liked Curly and was surprised to see him with Ponyboy, they rarely hung out. But there they were together. I had heard that his brother Tim got caught robbing a gas station and sent back to jail, nothing new for their family. I sat there hoping Pony wouldn't make it a habit to start hanging out with his kind of people.

When he finished looking me up and down he looked at me in the same place every guy looks at a girl, do they think we don't notice? "Hey Hero…"

I nodded. "Hi Curly."

"Seems like life's thrownin' you a bit of a curve ball eh?"

I shrugged. "That's life…anything I can help you with?"

"From the looks of it, there's a lot you can help me with."

I glared at him. "Excuse me?"

"When do you get off? There's a party at Buck's I'd love to take you to."

My eyes widen, everyone knew what happened at Buck's parties. "Get lost you little creep!"

"Touchy touchy…I promise you I won't leave you in the situation you're in now. I mean why shouldn't you go out and have fun while you still can, you're only a slut right now…still months away from mommy."

I looked over at Ponyboy, begging inside for him to defend me. But he just kept walking around the store, as if it wasn't any of his business. My heart sank; I felt my knees go weak like they did the night Mom and Dad died. Ponyboy ignored the advances of a pure slim ball, someone I had always been told by each of my brothers to avoid. How the hell could getting pregnant be so bad that they would stop defending me?

I was dumbfounded that I couldn't even defend myself against what he said. Thankfully Susie was by my side. "Get the hell out of here you piece of white trash and don't ever let me see your face in here again or I'll make sure you can never reproduce!" She paused then smiled. "Wait, maybe that would be a good thing…walk out then walk back in."

"Fuck you bitch." He said glancing at Susie then back at me. "You know how to get in contact with me Hero, I promise you more fun then that guy gave ya." He winked at me as if I was impressed, then marched outside, followed by a few others, including Ponyboy.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

By the time I got home that night, I had plenty of time to think about what happen and reflect on the situation. What did I come to? Ponyboy was a jerk and I was going to beat the hell out of him!

I marched into the house to see Two-bit, Steve, and Sodapop all sitting in the living room watching tv.

I was fuming. "Where the hell is Ponyboy?"

Before anyone could answer he walked in from the kitchen. "Can I help you?"

"What the hell is your fucking problem!" I screamed at him, creating fist with my hand, raising them to my head and slamming them back down to my side.

He just stood in the doorway with this proud look he had developed over the years. I hated that look! I wanted to beat his face in until he'd never be able to make it again.

I marched up to Ponyboy, pinning him between me and the doorway of the kitchen. "Answer me right now you asshole! Why did you let Curly talk to me like that?"

He shrugged. "I told you after what happened with Joseph, I'm not defending you against anyone. You made your bed now lie in it."

I've never been shot before, but at that moment the feeling I had in my heart has to at least be close to the pain someone would feel. My own brother didn't care, someone who I had grown up with and who had said that no guy was ever going to be good enough for me, has turned his back on me. For months now I'd been taking every single person's crap. Because of one night and one mistake, I was being criticized like I was the kind of slime that crawled around Buck's place. Everyone here knew better, they knew I wasn't like that. But they didn't care they weren't on my side. I know what I didn't wasn't right or even completely fair to Ponyboy, it wasn't all him. At that moment I wasn't thinking, I balled all my anger and frustration into that moment and I reacted the way any other person would of reacted.

My right fist tightened just like Dallas had taught me. I brought it back behind me, just out of Ponyboy's sight. Then I punched him, right across the face, making sure to follow through with all the weight in my body. To me it happened in slow motion, I saw the look of disgust on Ponyboy's face turn to surprise in an instant; I saw his face curl back as my knuckles met his temple, and I watched him tumble to the floor of the kitchen, one hand trying to brace his fall the other flying to his face like a pansy little girl.

"Hero!" Sodapop said as he made his way around me and held out his hand to help Ponyboy up. "You okay Pony?"

"Yeah I'm fine…" He looked at me. "That proves anything?"

I smiled. "Proves I can kick you ass!"

"Really?" He started to walk towards me, but Sodapop pulled him back.

"Knock it off the both of you!"

I looked over at Sodapop not realizing that my eyes had softening and were pleading with him. "After what he just did to me he deserves worst then that! I'm your sister and guess what buddy, that's not fucking changing so get use to it! You're related to the biggest slut in town!"

"Sounds like you're proud of it."

My fists tighten again, but this time he noticed it, he put his arms up to block any punch I could throw. So instead, I kicked him right in the knee, making him yelp like a cat and grab onto his knee for dear life. "Bitch…" He mumbled under his breath.

I sniffed, starting to cry. I barely managed to sniffle out "fuck you" before running outside, out the gate and down the street.

I spent the night at Susie's house that night. Let me tell ya, her parents were oh so happy to see me. They felt the same way everyone else in town did, but thankfully they didn't turn me away, but I had to promise it was one night and to be gone by 6 am.

I did as I was told and walked into my house around 6:15 am. Sodapop and Darry were getting ready for work when I walked in.

Sodapop walked up to me as he was putting on his belt. "Hey Hero…you okay?"

I nodded. "Yeah I'm fine…just a bit tired."

"Where were you last night?" Darry bellowed from the kitchen.

I walked in and coolly walked past him. "Getting laid at Buck's."

"That's not funny Hero Marie Curtis!"

I turned around and looked at him. "You know I'm not like that Darry…and it's not like I don't know who the father of this kid is. I'm sorry I over-reacted with Pony, but I'm not sorry I punched. All three of you need to grow up and be men and realize two things, this baby is coming no matter what you guys want and also, I'm not a little girl anymore." I took a deep breath. "You guys may be going through a lot right now, but I'm getting it from everyone in town and this child inside of me making me pee every 5 minutes! So could you at least back off or go back to not talking to me? I preferred that over this."

I stood there looking at him with pleading eyes. I was tired and soar and just begging for an ounce of sympathy from anywhere I could get it. Of course, not Darry he just rolled his eyes and marched out the door.

Sodapop smiled at me. "You're off work today, so just go to bed…don't come out unless you need to."

I took Sodapop's advice; except for I refused to come out of my bedroom unless I need to for days. I would use the bathroom and go to work; after work I'd take something from the kitchen and go eat in my room. I didn't want to face any of them and it probably made things a lot more comfortable for them not to have my pregnant belly hanging around. They missed watching it grow quiet a bit, by the time anyone was brave enough to knock on my door, I was at 24 months along and felt like I was carrying a soccer ball under my blouse.

I just got home from work and made myself comfortable on my bed, it was beginning to be a struggle; that's when I heard a small knock at my door.

Curiosity took over, "Come in…"

In walked bright eyed Two-bit, with a cheesy smile like he always wore. "Hey Hero, checking to see if you're alive."

I smiled at him. "Hey Two-bit…I just walked through the living room about 5 minutes ago, it's hard to miss my waddle."

"Yeah well…the guys and I are going to go get pizza…you wanna come?"

I shook my head. "No thanks…I'll make myself something, I'm trying to watch my weight, I feel like I've gained a million pounds!"

He laughed, "Yeah you have gotten pretty big since the last time I saw ya, how much longer do you have?"

"About three more months…god I can't wait to get this thing out of me!"

"You sure you're really ready to be a mom Hero?"

I shook my head. "No I'm not really…but I don't think I have much of a choice now."

"Thought of any names?"

I laughed, "Come on Two-bit you knew my parents…I have to think of something crazy or the baby won't be a Curtis."

He looked at me for a moment as if he was searching for some meaningful words that would help me. Of course, Two-bit was never the emotional one. "You sure you don't want to go with us?"

I just smiled and shook my head. "No, but can you help me up?"

Two-bit jumped up, grabbing my arm, and pulling my off the bed. Dear God I thought he was going to pull my arm out of the socket! He walked out of the room with me waddling behind him.

As I made it into the kitchen, I saw the guys walking out the door. I didn't say good-bye to even of them, just walked over to the fridge in hopes of something chocolate. Thank god my family loves chocolate cake. I pulled it out of the fridge and turned to set it on the table, but stopped. On the other side of the table stood Darry.

"Hi!" He said rather abruptly, but it woke me from my daze.

I set the cake down. "Hi…" I walked over to the other side of the kitchen and grabbed a knife from the drawer.

"We're going to get pizza…you want to join us?"

Okay…who was this and what had they done to my brother? His attempt at kindness made me stop and stare at him, debating on how to react. If I get excited and go, I would probably be let down by either someone else being rude or him not actually wanting me to go, but since he saw me he felt like he should offer. If I say no and I'm rude to him, I've given up all hope of us ever being able to fix our relationship.

I gave a half smile. "No thanks…I'm craving chocolate."

He laughed, "Yeah I remember when Mom was pregnant with you she craved chocolate a lot…"

I nodded. "She told me she craved it with all of us…hence why we love chocolate so much." I meant to say more, but was stopped by a sharp pain in my back, making me grab it and whince in pain.

I saw Darry's face go to serious in an instant. "You okay?"

I nodded as I sat down. "I'm fine…trust me, it's just part of being pregnant…random pains in random places."

He gave me a half-hearted smile and scratched at his head, he always does that when he's nervous. "Anything you want me to get you?"

I smiled, knowing that was Darry's way of saying he was sorry. "Can you get me a pack of cigarettes? And I'll take some breadsticks if you guys have any leftover."


	6. Chapter 6

Author's Note: For anyone who I did not reply to your review, thank you…Yes I realized I made a HUGE typo in months. I originally had it written out in months, but my friend's have been told weeks by their doctors and not months. Although I'm not sure if that was how it was done at the time, I thought I should try to go for that and I failed…. I'm sorry.

And another thing that I was wondering…so what do you think Hero should have, a boy or a girl?

Also, sorry it took me so long to update this story…I'll be surprised if anyone reads it! The computer I write it on was done for months before someone finally fixed it.

Chapter 6:

I finally decided on a crib after debating for a few weeks; a very simple wooden brown crib that could fit nicely into my already cramp room. Two-bit agreed to pick it up for me and get it to my house so I could put it together when I got off work.

I had a really rough day at work that day, my back pains were a little more constant and trying to get comfortable on a tiny stool was practically impossible now. The doctor had told me I was actually bigger then I need to be, but only suggested cutting down on the junk food. Hm…I work at a corner store and their specialty is candy and treats, how am I supposed to avoid that? I did good that day though, only one candy bar, but I think that's what made me so tired. The surprise I got when I got home though woke me up.

I set down my bag and made my way into the living room to find Sodapop and Steve having a play sword fight with the legs of my crib, the other parts lying around their feet like fallen soldiers.

I couldn't help, but laugh. "What are you guys doing?"

They stopped immediately and each gave me a look like a five year old that just got in trouble. Two-bit walked in from the kitchen, carrying the instructions in hand. "I found a screwdriver guys." He nodded at me, "Hey Hero."

I walked over and sat down on Darry's recliner, my feet were killing me. "I repeat: What are you guys doing?"

Two-bit laughed. "What does it look like we're doing, we're getting your crib set up."

I nodded. "Right…I planned on doing that myself."

"Don't worry, we got this." Steve said trying to act macho like always.

I smiled. "Why not wait for Darry to get home? He knows this stuff better then you guys."

Sodapop gave me a fake pout. "Are you saying we're not doing a good job?"

I raised my eyebrow at him. "You and Steve are having a sword fight with the legs, I may not have read the instructions, but I'm pretty sure that's not in there."

"Oh yes it is smarty pants. Its right under dumping everything out of the box and right before setting it all on fire."

I laughed. "You do that and let me know how Darry reacts."

Darry walked in and looked around. "What's with the mess?"

"They're getting ready to burn my crib, it's in the instructions."

Darry shook his head as he marched towards the kitchen. "Sometimes I wonder if they put pudding in your heads rather than a brain."

Two-bit sat down in front of me, flipping the directions around. "Okay…I can't find number one. I had it before I got up."

I grabbed the directions from Two-bit. "Let me see that!" I scanned over it and leaned over as much as I could and pointed. "Right there…where the number is…that's the first step."

Two-bit took the directions from me. "Hmm…number one, read the directions."

Sodapop smiled. "Does that mean we finished step number one?"

I smiled back. "No I think you finished step 0.5, get bored and play with the parts, attempting to break them and costing your dear sister a bunch of money." I started to laugh, but the laughter caused cramping in my stomach, making me whence and grab at my stomach. "God…" I mumbled to myself, reaching into my purse and lighting a cigarette.

"Relax, we've got this."

I laughed while exhaling. "Please…" I turned my head up. "Darry, for the love of God help them before they break the one nice thing I have."

Darry walked in, wiping his hands on a towel. "That ain't the only nice thing you got."

I looked at him. "Really?"

"Yeah…you've got nice older brothers." He laughed, tossing the towel at me.

I sighed. "Yeah, but you didn't come with a return feature!" I leaned back closing my eyes. "What's for dinner?"

"Chicken…potatoes…" Darry said dryly.

I whined slightly to myself. "But I could really go for a hot dog right now…with the works."

He laughed. "Sorry chick, we're out of the works."

I tilted my head up and looked at him. "Look, how about you carry the ball under my shirt around for a while, I'll go get some hot dogs and be right back…" I laughed. "Promise."

He laughed in reply. "Yeah, I really want to take on that thing." He looked at me a minute then shook his head. "You wouldn't look as big as you do if you weren't so skinny."

I rolled my eyes. "So I take after grandma, sue me!"

"I'm just saying like I always said, you eat like a mouse."

I laughed. "Oh yeah, this stomach came from eating like a mouse, thanks Darry."

"Yeah well now you're eating like you're never going to eat again, what did the doctor say about your weight last time you were there?"

That took me off guard, my brothers never asked about my doctor appointments. "Umm…" I stammered a bit. "He said I was bigger then a woman usually is around the time I'm at."

"Then I think that means you need to eat healthier, so no hot dogs for you."

I rolled my eyes. "Fine, but I'm not promising to be very nice to night."

Steve chirped in. "So you promise to be yourself?"

I glared at him, throwing the towel Darry had previously thrown at me to Steve, hitting him in the face. "Go home Steve!"

With my next paycheck, I decided to look around a store to decide what else I needed to buy. Although my brothers had come around, they didn't want to join my shopping trip. I dragged Susie along with me.

As we browsed through the aisle, all along the clerk staring at me with a disgusted look, Susie held up a pink outfit and smiled. "This is really cute!"

I laughed. "And I'm sure if it's a boy, he'll very much appreciate a pink outfit."

"True…" she said putting it back. "I wish there was a way to know what you were having."

I shook my head. "I'm not buying anything…maybe some diapers." I laughed. "I'm sure my brothers will love seeing the piles of diapers. Darry will still make comments about my diapers any chance he gets."

"Things still doing better with them?"

I shrugged. "Darry and Sodapop have come around more, Pony stays away as much as possible. I guess it's harder for him since we're closer to the same age, know the same people."

"So when the baby starts crying is he just going to ignore it?"

I smiled to myself. "Probably, but whatever I'm not going to force him. At least he doesn't come in the store anymore, I don't have to put up with that." I paused a moment. "So…what's going around school?"

Susie face went flat when she turned to me. "You really want to know?"

"Probably not…but just say it please."

Susie shrugged, turning away from me as she flipped through some more clothes. "Just the same thing going on this summer. Same thing my parents said when you came over. Same old same old that school doesn't change."

I sighed to myself. "Guess I'm not going back to school."

"What does it matter? Soda didn't graduate and he seems to be doing good."

"I tried using that defense, it's not enough for Darry."

"What? Did he think you'd go to college?"

I shrugged. "Maybe…doubt it my grades were never good enough."

"So there…you were going to become a house mom some day…you just started a bit early." We walked up to the counter and I handed the diapers to the clerk as Susie continued. "Are you going to take time off work?"

"Now? No…I've still got to get some more money together."

"I meant when the baby was born. My neighbor took a month off when her baby was born."

I shrugged. "I don't know, I've got take some time off…figure out things for a sitter." I put my hand on my stomach and half smiled. "I mean I have to take care of the baby."

I took the money from the clerk who continued to stare at me. I rolled my eyes. "Anything I can help you with?"

"How old are you?" The older man with gray hairs coming from his ears and glasses as big as coke bottles said as he leaned in, staring at me.

"How old are you?" I smiled. "Do you have a problem with my shopping here because I can take my business else where."

He shook his head as he turned away from me. I sighed to myself and walked out the door, making a mental note not to return to this store.


	7. Chapter 7

"I thought I told you to stop snacking." The doctor said as he gazed at my weight on the scale.

I couldn't believe it either; I had gained so much I don't even want to tell you! "I swear I have." I said stepping down. "I'm not sure why I keep gaining."

We walked into the examining room and I sat down on the table. The doctor flipped through his chart as he asked "Anything new?"

"Lots of back pains and sometimes it gets hard to breathe."

The doctor nodded. "That's perfectly normal. You're about to start your first week in your third trimester so your uterus has stretched a lot. Let's just take a look and make sure everything is normal." I lay back as he examined my stomach. "Have you made any plans?"

I took a deep breath, his hands were cold! "Saving up as much money as I can, I bought a crib a few weeks ago, its set up and in my bedroom. I know I'll need more things, but I'm not really sure what all I'm going to need."

The doctor paused for a second. "You're keeping the baby?"

I was confused. "Why wouldn't I?"

"I've seen a lot of girls come in with your situation, Hero. It's not an easy one. Maybe you should talk to the consoler we have on staff, she may be able to help you with your decision."

I was shocked to hear the doctor's opinion and agreed to speak to the consoler. Maybe I could get her to understand where I was coming from.

I walked into the office of Mrs. Fields. She was a petite brunet, with rosy cheeks and a sweet smile. She could barely be thirty years old. She smiled as I walked in. "Hello, Hero. Why don't you have a seat?"

I sat down in the chair in front of her desk, feeling a bit better. Certainly she would understand how I feel about keeping my baby.

She slipped on a pair of tiny glasses and looked at the paper in front of her. "Ok…so you are roughly twenty-seven weeks along." She glanced up. "I'm surprised you haven't come to talk to me sooner." She got up and started going through her file cabinet.

I shrugged. "No one suggested it, I didn't even know there was a consoler here."

She smiled as she sat down. "That's ok, we should be able to be completely ready as soon as that little one gets here." She sat some papers down in front of me. "I'm sure we'll find the perfect couple to adopt your baby."

"Adopt?" I said as I raised my eyebrow. "What are you talking about? I'm keeping my baby."

She sat back. "Why would you want to do that?"

"Why wouldn't I want to do that? It's my child."

She smiled again, only this time it looked more annoyed than sweet. "Why don't we bring in your parents to talk about this, where are they sweetie?"

I nodded. "They're probably playing bridge or some other card game with my grandparents in heaven, if you have a direct line I can attempt to find them for you."

She bit her lip. "I'm sorry for your loss…and at such a young age I'm sure you've been search for approval since whatever happened."

"What happened was a car accident, not whatever; I would think a consoler would know how to speak to someone about something like this in a lot more understanding tone, though I guess my situation makes it difficult doesn't it?"

Mrs. Fields sighed in frustration. "Who is your legal guardian?"

"My oldest brother Darrel, he's been taking care of me for the last few years since my parents died. It's legal, set up through the court and he's not a child." I looked her up and down. "He's probably not far from your age actually."

"And I'm sure he has explained to you the difficulty in raising a child at such a young age."

I nodded. "Yes, we've talked about it briefly."

"He wants what is best for you and what's best for this child. You both have plenty of growing up you still need to do and it will be very difficult for you to do it together."

"You talk like my brother put you up to this, my brother has no say in my doctors appointments so I would ask you to please not refer to him in that way."

Mrs. Fields sat back, studying me for a minute. In the silence I could feel her eyes tracing up and down my body. It's the same thing all adults do when they see me. Glare right through like if they look long enough this abnormality under my shirt will disappear and they'll be able to see a care free teenager playing hide and seek.

"You're smart for your age, Hero, I will give you that. I've seen plenty of girls like you come in here thinking they can take on the world and take care of their child. With the war and free love all around us, plenty of kids have given themselves of each other and ended up in this situation. And yes I'm sure whatever the boys' name that did this to you, if you know for sure, says that you're going to live happily ever after, but trust me sweetie, it will end. Very soon he's going to realize exactly what he has gotten himself into and not feeling the connection you feel, he will run off with the next group of hippies with a bus. Its better we set this up now, rather than waiting till after. It's easier if you have a plan."

I took a deep breath to steady myself, I didn't want to sound like a child on a tantrum or give her any reason to think I did not fully comprehend what she had just told me. Leaning back slightly to help the ache in my back, I looked straight into Mrs. Fields eye. "Do I look like a hippie to you? Sure, I'm not a fan of the war, but am I really in a place to be making a judgment about that currently? No, I don't think a health clinic is a place to discuss this, but since you bring this up, I figure I would address it. Yes, I know who the father of my child is and I find it sad that even a professional like you cannot look past stereotypes and see who a person really is. The father of this baby left before anyone knew the baby was in there. Now yes, I do not know where he is, but no, I haven't been living the past six months with the understanding that I would be playing the happy mommy with the father by my side for support. All I have are my brothers and what they taught me is that you don't give up on family. My oldest brother had a choice of shipping me and my two brothers into a home and going off to college and making something of himself, but he didn't. He kept our family together because as my parents taught us, family is important. I'm not going to let this child ever think for a second it wasn't important to me and it wasn't part of my family."

I got up and started to walk towards the door, stopping before I grabbed the handle. "You don't think I can't see the way you're looking at me? You don't think the other girls that you've talked to haven't seen it? We see it every time we walk down the street. We've committed a horrible act that doesn't seem so horrible to me since it creates life and was obviously used to make all of us. But either way, I just want you to know that to help someone; you should really turn off your judgmental eyes and listen to them. You may actually be able to help someone if you do that." I started to turn the door knob, and then smiled back at Mrs. Fields. "Have a nice day." And out the door I went.


End file.
